Wednesday, December 20, 2006



Anonymous said:

"Talk of trust is great, until it becomes obvious that it runs one way. Now we'll be subject to drug testing so LANS looks like it's trying Real Hard to be safe and secure. And Mike will feel better when he knows those around him (upper management?) are clean. Maybe there's no plan to plan for a RIF because the intent is to disrespect and insult people enough that they leave, improving the bottom line without a RIF."


There's continued talk of lie-detector tests, too, but that may be restricted to those who access Top Secret Sigma 15 stuff. (They might not mind so much the unscientific aspects of polygraphy. Who knows? maybe they even get a little thrill out of the experience.)

But I have been assured that there is absolutely no evidence that LANS/NNSA/DOE will be subjecting anyone to "waterboarding." That practice is confined mostly to CIA operatives, and CIA agents are so macho, they demand to be waterboarded, drug tested, and polygraphed (with current applied at the "EXTREME MAX. - DANGER! DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME" setting). Obviously, wimpy LANL bomb guys (nerds that you can see wandering around Los Alamos townsite with adhesive-tape-repaired hornrim glasses) will not be held to such a high, rigorous standard. (Remember, too, that Mikey used to be one himself before he became Livermore Director.)

--Pat, the Dog

P.S. Just so everyone is clear on what gets posted on this new Blog: I am not an UPTE shill. Nor am I a LANS shill. Nor am I very fond of NNSA/DOE or anyone else in the present Executive Branch. Check out what corporatization has done for ... Houston (ENRON) ... Baghdad (Halliburton & Bechtel) ... New Orleans ... Los Alamos ... and what it will do for Livermore, if none of the Livermore people stand up and resist. Will they be kinda like the courageous staff at Los Alamos? I hope for better than that, as new and bitter experiences keep pouring in from hapless LANL.

I post stuff on this Blog that stays on point and doesn't approach personal libelous attack. (FYI: "United States law dictates that for something to be considered libel it must be proven that the one making the libelous charges did so with malicious intent and with full knowledge that the statements were false. Furthermore personal opinion is protected as a First Amendment right. Therefore being careful to state the facts of a personal experience in non-malicious language, followed by words like, 'therefore in my opinion...' will go a long way towards protecting yourself against charges of slander or libel." Keep that in mind as you comment, my friends, just as I do. See:

In other words, unsubstantiated stuff that smells bad to me won't get published here. That doesn't mean for a minute that everyone who agrees with me gets posted, and everyone who disagrees doesn't get posted. To be perfectly frank with all of you, I really like a good argument, well presented. -Comprende?

Finally, like The Daily Show, we here at "LANL: The Corporate Story" are not above using sarcasm. Take care.


And here is a comment from "Anonymous":

"Pat, the Dog": Let's see, "Pat" is curiously ambiguous; it could be a verb or a noun. But the comma following it makes it clear that "Pat" is a noun. On the other hand, the gender is ambiguous: Is "Pat" masculine? Femine? Or neutered?
-Just Out of Curiosity

Dear "Just Out of Curiosity":
"Just out," as in "fresh out"? Or just "out of it"? This is the kind of inciteful post that is the high "water" mark in postings we have come to expect on this Blog. Keep it up, guys. We can take it in stride.

--Pat, the [curious, unambiguous] Dog



I want to preserve my Baaaaaaaaaanefits.



If it will let me keep my benefits.

I'll make plutonium pits! I'll haul radioactive trash!!


Just let preserve my baaaaaaaaaahnefits.


-Typical Lanl Herd Member

(I feel so sheepish posting this.)
Unbelievable story from AP. There is an obvious double-standard when it comes to handling classified matter, as shown by the events of this story and others during the last few years. I wonder if Sandy Berger ever had to pass a piss test? I also wonder when our top LANS managers will all be lining up to hand over their precious yellow fluid for analysis?

Report Says Berger Hid Archive Documents - AP, Dec 20, 2007

President Clinton's national security adviser removed classified documents from the National Archives, hid them under a construction trailer and later tried to find the trash collector to retrieve them, the agency's internal watchdog said Wednesday.

Berger pleaded guilty to unlawfully removing and retaining classified documents. He was fined $50,000, ordered to perform 100 hours of community service and was barred from access to classified material for three years.

The employees did not feel at the time there was enough information to confront someone of Berger's stature, the report said.

"He headed toward a construction area. ... Mr. Berger looked up and down the street, up into the windows of the Archives and the DOJ (Department of Justice), and did not see anyone," the interview notes said.

He then slid the documents under a construction trailer, according to the inspector general. Berger acknowledged that he later retrieved the documents from the construction area and returned with them to his office.

In October 2003, the report said, an Archives official called Berger to discuss missing documents from his visit two days earlier. The investigator's notes said, "Mr. Berger panicked because he realized he was caught."

The notes said that Berger had "destroyed, cut into small pieces, three of the four documents. These were put in the trash."

After the trash had been picked up, Berger "tried to find the trash collector but had no luck," the notes said.

From the original post:

"Maybe there's no plan to plan for a RIF because the intent is to disrespect and insult people enough that they leave, improving the bottom line without a RIF."

I'm not sure that it's possible to insult LANL staff enough to get them to leave. Look at how many are still work there after the last 2 1/2 years of abuse. If they're still there after Nanos, they'll still be there after drug testing and lie detector testing become a part of life there.
Union Now - Requiring a Piss test is a major change in the employment offer that we all accepted last year. This is only the start to future draconian measures that we can expect from LANS management. BTW these tests are easily defeated, do a search on Google for drug tests and find everthing you need to pass.
Thanks, Anonymous (10:01 AM)!
...But why should I have to pay out good money?
(Sign me, CheapAssLANLSheep)


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(Ummm, wait a minute...this sounds like some kind of Liberal-Leftist Santa Fe thing...flushing out my "toxins"?)
OK, Santa Fe Pussies!
Join a UNION, instead, then!

I say to drug tests and lie-detector tests: Bring 'em ON ! ! !

-Macho LANL bomb designer
(Anonymous, however, due to circumstances entirely beyond my control)
The reason everyone will be drug tested is that it makes it easier to take away HRP pay from the fine TSMs at 55. If everyone is being tested why should HRP get anything extra?

I am having some difficulties with this blog. Maybe I am missing the point, but it seems that you are forwarding the union via this entity that has done very little for me over the last few years. In fact, I have helped them far more "aux gratis". They have had plenty of opportunities in the past to make a difference. They don't meet my needs. They are out of touch with reality of the workforce. I have witnessed ineptness, incompetence, and poor leadership within the union. In reality, my time has been more constructively spent chasing other "cars". The "cars" they chase are not the cars that I want to chase.

Soooooo.....if this blog is a Union recruiting tool, please be up front about it. And, then I will decide if I still want to read/post on your blog.

Thanks for being honest......Isn't this something like one dog sniffing another dog's a$$? I want to know the skinny.....
Having decided to do this, LANS management will have zero credibiliy on this issue unless they test everyone not already in a program requiring testing. You test one, you test everyone. They think they have rumor problems now?

Sorry, but saying there are inusfficient funds, personnel, etc., is not going to cut it with the fans. If it's that important, let LANS put up some of their fee to get everyone tested. They put up $700k for United Way. Surely this is as important?

On the other hand, I look forward to some interesting results. My colleagues range in their estimates of positive hits. Some say < 1% while others are in the 10% range. Guess it depends on who your kids know and for which drugs they test.
Those people not already in some sort of testing program will be tested. LANS is merely catching up to the rest of industry.

Bring it on; I have no bad toxins to flush!
Perhaps this can be posted on its own. I've noticed that the State of New Mexico is getting bold at fining the lab for its little messes. Is this because the Lab had to stop its use of headquarters monies to finance any of its legal forays?
I heard the story that the lab, in the past, would spend $100,000 of HQ money to contest a $10,000 fine that would otherwise come from the LANL budget. The worm has turned and the lab is now properly responsible for pollution, at least.
Can anyone verify the statement that the lab only gets $50,000/year of patent royalties from 60 years of great research? (previous post) Is the amount that the lab receives kept secret?
If true, what does a comparably-sized academic institution get?
"Pat, the Dog": Let's see, "Pat" is curiously ambiguous; it could be a verb or a noun. But the comma following it makes it clear that "Pat" is a noun. On the other hand, the gender is ambiguous: Is "Pat" masculine? Femine? Or neutered?

-Just Out of Curiosity
From UPTE (the so-called "evil" Union that isn't doing anything "relevant"):

Livermore : Organizing To Save Our Jobs

Our members at Lawrence Livermore National Lab have seen the losses that employees at Los Alamos suffered and want a different future. At this time, the Department of Energy plans to hand over the management of the lab, including more than 8000 employees, to a new, private contract. What happens to their retirement, if they have job, what their pay will be, what they will do are all unknown. At Los Alamos many were forced out of UC's pension plan, are now being laid off and have dramatically changed jobs.

In response, employees have begun a campaign for union representation. With a union, the employer must negotiate many of the transition changes instead of implementing them unilaterally. The initial response to our effort to collect signatures has been very positive.


At least the "evil" Union is trying to resist corporatization, rather than abet it. At least they aren't actively out to "get" the workers, their benefits, their retirements, and worsen their working conditions.
Dear UPTE (12/22/06 - 1:13 pm),

"Resistance is futile." Your efforts come too late and are too little.

The Union is not "evil" just inept. Comparing resistance to aiding and abetting corporatization, as you have, is just an example. It is going to happen whether the Union wants it to or not.

Too little, too late, too bad, so sad.
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